I am Chanel and turned 21 on 13oct. z6 & 10girls are my loves. MJ, suppers, clubs & dramamamas are my source of
entertainments. My rainbow colour is red;black;gold. &&&, i'm totally obsessed with SHOW♥羅志祥.
last wed night, headed ARENA w my HTF. fun night w them. lovess them ttm. very lazy to upload photo.
thks to cousin for fetching me home. ♥
sat night, went ECP for dinner w cash, ken & cousin. thn walked ard. home sweet home after awhile.
thn sun, four of us went cycling @ ECP AGAIN! haha. quite a last min decision la. tt's the thing abt us, TOTALLY RANDOM. haha. was a fun one except for the aching legs. LOL.
dinner @ some HK cafe. headed to loyang dua pek gong to pray thn off to cine for movie, KICK ASS. lky so boohoohoo. NOT NICE AT ALL. dissapointing. photos still with cash. will get it from him soon.
was doing my MAP report recently. lky wtf la. I DUNNO HOW TO DO. i'd rather go thru another exam thn to do this damn report! went to sch library, national library & blahs.
just now, went dinner w cousin @ PASTA MANIA. thn icecream @ UDDERS. we ♥ icecream. heeee. :)
am going down to IMPRESS tml to get my hair dyed. cos, nxt tues got interview. i think my current hair colour, CMI. lol.
andandand, IMMA SO LOOKING FORWARD TO 30TH APRIL cos, WE'E GOING TO GENTING GENTING! it's not genting tt's making me all excited. it's bcos it has been a long tym since the whole family went together & this tym, plus ken, cash & tong!
some randoms.
ok, KUDOS! back to my MAP. _!_
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when you said you miss me, i know it wasnt right from ur heart. it's just an habit of yours. but when i said I MISS YOU, i really meant it.
11:41 PM
Friday, April 16, 2010
There is this one guy, who never made it out of my heart.
From the very first eye contact we made, I sort of knew, knew that, IMMA GONNA LOVE HIM SO MUCH.
It's been lky almost 2years. Nothing changes. Except that, he gets deeper & deeper into my heart. Like it's stuck in the mud, you find it so hard to pull it out.
Friends? Yes. Best of the friends? Yes too. Soulmates? Maybe. But, we never made it to be in LOVE.
I was never a dare-devil when it comes to "ILOVEYOU". My friends always tell me, "There's nothing to be afraid, just go for it. You never know, he might be the one. You have to try."
I told her, "But you never knew, I am not afraid of rejections, I am just afraid, we can't even be friends. I'd rather remain status quo."
Confession either lead you to a start or to an end. It's a gamble, a gamble that i never dared to risk.
Sometimes, he would call. Sometimes, we have nothing to speak. Just asking some random things,then silence. It would end in just awhile. But it was all enough for me. But sometimes, we could talk like everything. From A-Z. Our conversations always sounds so cheery.
The only times when the laughters are missing is when he's down. He would tell me how he loved and missed her.
I, on the other side of the phone, trying hard to hide my sadness and consoling him and telling him some 'love philosophy'.
He is one person, whom I will never get it right. I never know, when he mean it & when he don't. Sometimes, I am so afraid to believe his words, cos I'll only hurt myself even more.
But as times passes, I've learnt to be strong. Hiding my tears with my laughters. Hoping my laughters would cheer him up a little.
Up till today, I've started to understand/realise many things. Like, wewouldneverbetogther.
I'd always have this little glimmer of hope, that miracles do happen. I know, ILLUSION.
I've told myself many times, GIVE UP & LET IT GO. But, how much determination & strength does one need to really do that?
I've tried, giving him the cold shoulder a few times.
Building up walls between me & him. Maybe he could sense me doing all this. he could just break the walls so easily.
I don't know when I'll really get him outta of my heart. I am not having any hope nor wishing for any miracle.
Life goes on & it will, until he's gone from my heart. Right now, I'm just doing my best to cherish our friendship. :)
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P/S : just an urge to express all out. P/P/S: i am still a happy kid! :)
4:28 AM
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
SORRY FOR THE DAMN LONG NVR UPDATE.
as usual lah, have been busy. just finished my last module for the whole course. which means, I'M GRADUATING SOON.
one more project to go. MAP. MGMT APPLICATION PROJECT. i bet, this is gonna drive me nuts. REAL NUTS.
nvm, will start working on it tml. shall not think too much abt it 1st.
and also, started looking for jobs alrdy. things not going very smoothly. quite dejected over this issue.
but of cos, you know, i'm the happy-go-lucky-cant-be-bothered type. life still goes on for me even when i'm facing all this issues.
anyway, have watched X-FUTURE COPS w yun. kuakuakua. not very nice. i wld lky rate it lkyonly 2.5/5? my personal pov lah. perharps some andy lau fans think tt i am just doing injustice to this movie. but of course, some scenes are lky damn gan chiong. it's the storyline tt i dont really like.
have yet to watch CLASH OF THE TITANS.
mostly catching it this wkend.
nice anot ah?
there are lky very extreme positive & negative reviews.
making me all confused whether it's worth to watch not.
LOL.
ok la, srsly, i'm lky damn hell lazy to update. nth much to update also. yea, leading a real boring life recently.
ok, bye my lovessss. =)
p/s: chanellovechua is still baobeichua. p/p/s: i want shisha session soon! p/p/p/s: guanyinma, bless me pls! ty.